28 Oct When My Children Didn’t Want to Celebrate Halloween Anymore

It kind of felt like that Easter morning when my children came to tell me, giggling, that they didn’t believe in the Easter Bunny. In fact, they claimed, they never did. While they were still toddlers, they apparently casually watched from their bedroom window as I got home from a night shift. I allegedly ran around the yard, hiding eggs in all sorts of places. They watched it all and never said a word. For YEARS! Although I do remember thinking how strange it was that they ran straight for the eggs and found every single one of them. But you get my drift. I was hit broadside when my children came to tell me, this time, that they didn’t want to celebrate Halloween anymore.

My Children LOVED Halloween

Now, maybe this is a Christian parenting failure, I don’t know – but for some reason, my kids always loved Halloween. They probably loved it more than any other celebration. They would plan their costumes for months ahead, and then change their minds 83 times. We’d plan Halloween-themed dinners, with green goo and slimy brains. They would beg to carve or paint pumpkins. Together, we’d make innumerable crafts and decorations, and I’d find creepy little toy spiders all over the place for months.

I Loved Halloween Too!

I, on the other hand, grew up in a very conservative home, where dressing up and trick or treating was not permitted. So I now thoroughly enjoyed my children’s enthusiasm. In fact I ran with it. I helped them plan their costumes – in fact I made most of them. We’d cook together and make cupcakes dripping in red icing. I would invent crafts for them to do if they ran out of ideas, like fall and Halloween-themed salt dough ornaments. Most of all, I looked forward to getting them dressed up to go trick or treating. There’s seriously nothing cuter than Little Bow Peep and Shawn the Sheep – or a bumble bee and butterfly – or a spider and a cat walking up to a door and knocking, holding their little pumpkin baskets up for candy.

But a couple of years ago, it all stopped abruptly. It was the week of Halloween and the house was decorated with cobwebs and spiders. I had pumpkins on the porch and googly eyes in the bushes. We were gearing up for their favorite night, when my children came to me and asked: “Can we not go trick or treating this Halloween, and you just buy us candy?”

“WHAT?! NO! That’s not how it works!” Mostly I was shocked. This came out of nowhere, and I wasn’t ready for it.

It’s hard when your children reach an age where they no longer want to celebrate holidays like they used to. All of a sudden, it feels like those cherished family traditions that you looked forward to every year disappear overnight. If you find yourself in this situation this year, here are a few things that you can do:

Talk it Out

Talk to your children about why they don’t want to celebrate Halloween anymore. It could be that they’re simply not interested in dressing up or going door-to-door asking for candy. Or, it could be that they feel like they’re too old for it. Whatever the reason, talking about it will help you better understand their perspective and figure out a way to move forward.

Don’t Force It

I was tempted to demand one last trick-or-treating escapade. After all, we’d made the costumes and all. But I realized I shouldn’t end it like that. We’d had a good run. I guess at some point, Halloween became more important to me than it was to the kids. So, I respected their wishes. Now we can look back on those memories with fondness and laughter.

Find New Traditions

Are there any other ways you can still celebrate Halloween as a family? This is a great opportunity to start a new tradition together. Instead of going trick-or-treating, maybe you could still decorate, but this time you can hand out the candy. Maybe you could throw a party! Or go to a haunted house! Our family decided that we would go out to dinner together, then turn off all the lights, make some popcorn and some snacks, and watch a spooky movie together.

This year, my children decided they wanted to give back to our community. They want to hand out candy to the little neighborhood trick-or-treaters. It’s nostalgic for me, but I’m proud of them. Traditions change, but new traditions can be just as enjoyable and precious as the previous ones. Children are not always going to want to celebrate Halloween the same way. For our family, these changes have brought us closer together as a family – and isn’t that what it’s all about?